by Emily Cavin
Some years ago
I had a magical night
At the Fire Circle
And was able to share that magic
With everyone there
The next day people thanked me
Appreciated my offerings
And I guess, frustrated performer that I sometimes am,
I became confused
Unable to distinguish
Not clear enough to choose
Between channeling
And claiming the channel as my own
Between Ego and Spirit
Expectation and Openness
To the Truth
of Circling On
A few years later
I created some static
At the Fire Circle
I thought it was working
Though my point of view
Was narrower than I knew
The next day I was criticized
Unconstructively
By one who claimed
“Everybody is saying – someone needs to talk to you”
Turns out that wasn’t quite true
Man! – that made me angry at the unkind “master”
But then things shifted
The master’s partner
A favorite drummer of mine
Had to face that threshold
To stand before that door indelibly marked
“Mortality”
and I could be angry no more
It is interesting to see what falls away
What doesn’t serve to keep me
Circling On
Although ashamed to admit it now
I used to judge others, judge their offerings
At the Fire Circle
Only sometimes, never out loud, but still, too often
“That doesn’t feel authentic”
“That’s arrogant, that’s over-rehearsed”
until one night, an unsought voice
Inside myself but somehow not my own
Struck me with these words:
“Not only are you being unkind
adopting such an attitude – but know this:
given the journey you seek to make by coming here,
YOU ARE GETTING IN YOUR OWN WAY!!”
Who knew!?
Such wisdom could be gained by
Circling On
Now that I did know
I watched for signs
At the Fire Circle
And sure enough there came a night
Someone’s offering
Just wasn’t working for me
OK – so be it
No need for judgment – Let it go
Until the next night – Like Magic!
Oh! How well it’s working now!
Seemingly for all of us,
Rocking, flying, soaring, shining
Voices, drums, dances, stillness
Held in the hands of Beings beyond ourselves
And I knew it as the culmination
Of all the moments,
All the nights that came before
It simply could not be
This night
Had last night been any different
That’s just how it happens
That’s just how it keeps on
Circling On
Come the final dawn
of that gathering
At the Fire Circle
Someone is speaking
On and on and on –
And on and on
Again, for me, not quite working
On some level,
So I find another
Look up, look up!
It’s almost sunrise
The sky is nearly light
The Maple leaves
strung like petals from the Trees
witnessing our Circle
Are growing green out of the darkness
And there are birds, beautiful birds!
Different shapes, different sizes
Speaking their own language, sharing their songs
Sailing over us, crossing through center
Each flight a unique silhouette
I am spellbound
Held by the web of mystical morning coming to this mountain top
Waves of Day breaking on this Enchanted Island
Planet Earth
Circling On
I have come to a place
Where I am at a loss in my life
Shaken, a stranger to myself
As if I stand on shifting sands
And yet it seems I will always know
The Earth beneath my feet
Find my path lit by Spirit Fire
Can always add my voice
to the ringing music riding on the Wind
And feel the gratitude
Flowing through the Water
That is offered, and that I offer
To this sacred place
This gathering of Beings
Seen and unseen
Intuited and alchemized
Dancing and Still
Mortal, Elemental, Energetic
All coming together
Being found by what we seek
If we have faith and keep an open mind
If we lend a hand and follow our feet
And our hearts
To the Fire Circle
We will find our way to what we need to know
We will continue to grow on the journey
We will thrive as we continue
Circling On